Help Me!

God help me, I think I’m losing it again. I don’t really remember the last couple of days. I haven’t slept in such a long time, and I’m terrified of everything. What the hell is happening to me? My arms are all cut up and raw. My apartment smells awful, but as soon as I leave, I feel this terrible panic rising up slowly in my gut, and I have to run back here. I hate this place.
I can hear things moving around me, speaking to me, sometimes shouting. I tried calling Erik, but he didn’t answer his phone. God only knows where he is in all of this. I called my therapist, and she told me to do my relaxation tapping, take my medication, and to go back to sleep. She said a relapse was to be expected, or something like that. I don’t know what to believe anymore. Am I really insane? Or is this all real? God, I don’t know anymore. I just don’t know anymore.