Mornings Suck

I called in sick this morning. I just couldn't do it. I haven't had an appetite for awhile now, although I occassionally force myself to eat something, and I hardly slept at all last night. All I could do was lay in bed, thinking about what it was that I did wrong. I'm still not entirely sure. Lohan, a fellow blogger, said it has nothing really to do with me, and she'll come around and realize she really does have feelings for me, and that she's just scared right now. I hope she's right. It's just hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I guess I just have a hard time believing I'll ever be as happy as I was when she was with me. I know that sounds dumb and naive, but that's really how I feel. So I couldn't face goign to work today, and pretending everythings alright, when it really isn't. I get tired of smiling and nodding to stupid, inane conversations that coworkers seem to have, when inside your angry, scared, and sad all at once.

Whoever said life was simple?

But chin up. I try to emember that things could be much worse for me. I mean, how selfish and petty am I? In Indonesia and south asia, they now estimate 44,000 people have been killed because of the tsunamis, and all I can do is sit here and cry "Whoa is me" because my girlfriend dumped me. Sometimes I really hate myself. :)

Well, I hope you're all doing well. I'm going to try and eat something (it's been awhile) even though I'm not hungry. And again, thanks for all your kind words. You're helping me remember that there are good people still in this rotten world. :)