Bring Every Holy Answer Low And Hear!!!

Munda cor meum omnipotens Behalah calculo mundasti ignito

My eyes have been opened, and I have truly seen for the first time. The truth is almost too much to bear. I feel myself splitting, fracturing into a thousand pieces of consciousness, and I feel my mind, my poor mind which is too small to grasp the totality of existence, slowly forgetting what I have seen with my own two eyes. I have stared into the Abyss, and the Abyss opened an eye. The twisting Chaos writhed there, it’s tentacled, wet, bulbous mass shifting and growing, ever changing. It seemed to grow larger, or perhaps I smaller in its magnificent presence. The beauty, the horror, the sheer terror. It was glorious to behold.

Vidi aquam egredientem de templo

Even now, the memory of the moment fades, the moment when I truly saw what it was, and began to understand the enormity of it, and the smallness of man. Now I see how laughably absurd mankind is. We are nothing. We are less than nothing. We are but the smallest specks of dust on an infinite beach of sand. Our world, our culture, our lives, our works, our pleasures, all these things are transient, and shall pass away. But the mighty Behalah shall exist forever.

Sicut erat in principio, et nunc, et semper, et in saecula saeculorum.

That which has no beginning, cannot have an ending. Behalah, lord and master, destroyer of worlds, desolater and devourer. The Beast that walks in shadows shall reign forever. It is all around us, in the shadows, in the dark corners of our world, it is there, watching, waiting, planning with infinite patience. It’s ways are not ours to understand. The Beast. The glorious, Horrifying Beast. It will come for me, and I will open my arms, my veins, my shallow husk of a body, and receive it with gratitude.

Introibo ad altare Behalah: ad Deum

The Beast Cometh.

My Master!

My Lord!

Veni perditor occisor omnipotens aeterne Deus Behalah et benedic hoc sacrificum tuo sancto nomini praeparatum

Please!!!

I'm so scared. I'm cold, and I'm scared.

What's happening to me?

Behalah Will Come!

The Beast will come for us, and we will receive it. We will open up our throats and give our life blood for it to drink. The infant God shall reward us. The Chaos and destruction will come, and the Whisperer will know who I am. I wish to be embraced by it’s terrible darkness. I can hear it. The voice calls to me from the dark abyss, the chasm. I stare into it, and see myself. My name is written in the book that came to me, through paths winding. The bridge has been built, and shall never be torn, between this sphere and it’s own realm.

It will come.

It will come.

It will come.

It will come.

God Save Me!!!

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

God somebody help me!

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

Please, make this stop! God, please, anyone, please!

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

I’m so scared! God please, please help me!

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

I can’t feel myself, I am forgetting myself, God what is happening?

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

It calls me into the darkness, and I hear and obey.

The Beast Shall SDKJLKGFEA!!!

Even now, as I breath in this place, the fear, the stink of fear, is everywhere. But I am not afraid, not like the others. I shall perform my role, prove my greatness, and then Beahalah shall kdjlskdjfl kjlskdjfl sdlfkj sldkjflskdjf slkdfjlskfjiwueghijwenf,amvnajdhf ;alkf aaldkfn ajkfh aslkf al;kfh asklfaskdfjlkjeb aklfj al dfjdfjsdj fkdj slkdj ojwmans ohemen oijrklgn lrkj gorh lanlksnm dkjsh kajhwlajks l;asm bvihgsdua asl,xm zlkxh aigskaqnwlasmcljchv iiuh alk lajsh iaj

IT COMES! I HEAR IT! IT COMES!!!!

kjs l alkaj wem d okem lnj bkjn akj lakj nm iuh kmanslams jkh ejnalsm co aonw map xue nalaa alokns enlmn dnejn ne ejkal al s s s aopks melskmn kna amn wuybwe ebamsn lkx xc qo

What is Happening to Me?

I can’t think straight anymore. I’m having trouble remembering things. Like where I’ve been recently. The last couple of days are complete blanks. Every once in a while, a memory, a smell, or a taste, will flash through my mind like a jolt of electricity. My brain, my head, feels like it’s gong to explode. I am so anxious, I can’t sit still. I stand and pace, but the anxiety won’t leave. This is what true misery is.

Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to die? I’ve thought a lot about suicide, especially lately, when I’m myself. Maybe I should do it. End this whole mess. End it all. No more pain. No more fear. No more terror and anxiety. No more anything. Just the sweet peace of nothingness. When does life drive you to the point of desperation, to the point of no return, where everything is so horrible, that you’d rather not feel anything at all, ever again? I think I’m getting to that point.

!ON

Yes I think that’s what needs to happen now. !SIHT WOLLA TON LLIW I That’s what I tell myself, and then when I try to think of a way, cutting my wrists, or something, I lack the courage to do it. Even when I see a way out, I’m t!SRUO SI HSELF SIHo scared to even do it. Look at how pathetic I am. I can’t even end this.!REVEROF SU HTIW MAERD LLIW EH God, what am I going to do? What am I going to do?

Naming the Forgotten One

The Beast has many names: the Devourer in the Darkness, the Ever Open Eye, the Crawling Chaos, the Forgotten Faceless One, the Watcher of Worlds, the Shifter in the Shadows. It knows my name. I have looked into the darkness, and I have seen myself in it. The Beast will come for me, and I will not fight it. I will embrace it.